4 Reasons why you should budget as a couple

Today’s guest post is from Thando from Skilled Finances, a blog that empowers people to reach their financial goals and couples to become financially intimate.

The better half of Skilled Finances is his wife Lindie who runs their Instagram page where they make financial education fun.

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It’s often said money is one of the top leading causes of divorce and separation in a relationship.

At the very least, it certainly can lead to money fights and disagreements between couples.

I personally argue a piece of paper with someone’s face or a string of numbers in a mobile banking app has that impact.

In my opinion, it’s the way you manage money that positively or negatively impacts your union.

Why You Should Manage Money Together As A Couple

There are various ways in which you can budget as a couple to set up a system that works for you.

You can split joint bills 50/50 and leave things like savings, debts and spending separate.

Or, split joint bills according to income, which is, the one who earns more pays more towards bills. Still leaving the remainder separate.

Or you can choose to both be involved in budgeting 100% of your income together.

I’d like to make the case for why you should consider the option to manage all your money together.

1. You’ll Build Life Together

When you don’t budget together, you may end up managing your money like roommates.

This is when the focus is only on splitting the shared living expenses and nothing else.

This includes splitting your mortgage, utility bills, groceries and other shared expenses together.

However, focussing only on bills fosters a short-sighted mindset in how you manage your money.

You’d unlikely be discussing in detail debts, savings or investments if those are left separate.

I see a relationship as people building a life together.

When you’re managing your money together you begin to have conversations on what you’re trying to build.

Building a life together will look differently for every relationship but one thing is for certain, money is involved in all of them.

Your money discussion will go beyond paying bills into aspects such as debt repayment and building your income streams.

You’ll have a long-sighted view of the role money plays in your relationship.

2. You’ll Understand Each Other

People in a relationship will bring different viewpoints, backgrounds and life experiences.

Despite your love for each other, you’ll have differing views on money in some cases.

You can learn a lot about your partner’s money mindset when you’re managing money together.

Money mindset affects everything.

As an example, say your partner is a big believer in savings because they are motivated by security and stability.

But you’re more of a spender because you’re really into your gadgets and tech.

When you’re managing money together you get to see these habits in action.

Seeing them in action enables you to discuss money with your partner to understand their mindset.

For instance, you may decide to build your emergency fund whilst allocating money for spending. 

This way your partner’s security needs are met whilst your love for new tech is not neglected.

3. You’ll Support Each Other

If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.

Despite the many debates of the origins of this quote, it holds weight in this regard.

Everyone is on a money journey, and as a couple, you’ll be on your own journey too.

We all need help along our money journey to overcome obstacles or handle challenges.

The biggest reason why we succeeded in buying a house on a low income was through the support system we had.

When you manage money together you’ll support each other when the debt repayment journey gets tough.

You’ll hold each other accountable when one of you feels like spending on the credit card.

Support can even be that one of you takes the role of negotiating cheaper bills whilst the other looks at your investment portfolios.

The support you’ll be able to give each other when you manage money together as a couple is amazing.

4. Enhances Your Relationship

Relationships are built on trust, oneness and mutual respect.

When you both have a part in managing your money you’re further developing these qualities.

When I discuss a financial decision with my wife it’s not because I’m asking for her permission.

I’m asking for her input and opinion on the matter.

This proves to her that I value her thoughts and gives a sense that we’re in this together.

The way you manage money will influence and impact other aspects of your relationship.

If you let it, money can lead to you competing with your partner based on salaries.

Or feeling resentful if they have no debts whilst you’re carrying the weight of credit card debts.

I see money as a tool that will allow us to further enhance our love and union in our marriage.

How To Practically Manage Money Together As A Couple

Here are some practical tips on what this looks like in reality.

You adopt the mindset of seeing your money as joint household income, rather than yours and mine.

Discuss what living standards and lifestyle you’d like to live.

Discuss short term and long term financial goals for your relationship. Then come together to see if you have shared ambitions.

Build your budget together making decisions on allocations to living expenses, debt and future goals.

Only open joint accounts if necessary, this is more about having a joint mindset.

Discuss who’s owning which financial responsibilities.

Give each other room to be yourselves, so allocate personal pots for each other.

Finally, this is about teamwork and managing money together as a couple.